Frustration

Where to start...

I know it has been a couple of days, but to be honest, I haven't felt very motivated. Lets play a little catch up: Thursday night Corey and I went to see the Avengers at the midnight release and it was great. Saturday night my family celebrated my birthday by having dinner, we had veggies and steak. Sunday I didn't feel like working out, so I didn't. And so enters the guilt for not working out on Sunday. Yesterday was my 26th birthday, and I worked out because I knew Corey was going to get Indian food and I was going to gorge myself on it. I also worked out yesterday because I knew that I would feel guilty again if I didn't.

Friday I ran out of my Shakeology... and I had a little bit of chocolate and greenberry. Both tasted good, but the greenberry totally messed up my stomach yesterday. Almost throwing up. I got my Strawberry in the mail today, thank goodness, because I don't know if I could have gone another day without it.

You know, there are just sometimes when no matter how much weight you have lost, that you feel fat. I feel fat, I feel unmotivated. I know if I stop, I will lose every single bit of ground that I have gained. Even telling myself that I need to stay on track isn't doing it for me. I don't know what's going on. I'm frustrated with Turbo Fire, this month is the exact same thing, week after week. At least last month it was new, and it shook it up every week. This is the exact middle of my month, and I know I have another week of this. I didn't even work out today. I know I still can, but I don't want to. I'm just going to count this as my off day and workout tomorrow instead. That way I don't have any workouts to make up.

I know I just need to keep on chugging. Changes won't happen if I'm not doing anything. But I just don't want to do anything. I only lost one pound, and I weighed on Saturday because I knew I would be eating too much and I would have a ton of water weight to lose.

I'm so frustrated with myself. I guess I need more determination today than motivation, because what do you have when you run out of motivation? So no tasty tuesday because I have the Tuesday blues. :(